Sage (sold by Dean & DeLuca) Carrot Cake Cupcake

Sage Carrot Cake Cupcake from Dean & DeLuca, $5, http://www.sagegeneralstore.com/ and http://www.deandeluca.com

Taste: This is a very cream-cheese-y cream cheese frosting, not as sweet and delicious as the Two Little Red Hens creamcheese frosting, but still decent. The cake taste is abysmal though-- it's essentially flavorless with a hint of nutmeg. It's not sweet at all, doesn't taste like the chock full of brown sugary goodness that a delicious carrot cake should taste like, this cake is totally lacking in flavor except the hint of nutmeg I mentioned, and I can't even taste any carrots! The icing is way better than the cake. Eating the icing and the cake together, the cake is just a vehicle with which the icing can be enjoyed, and together with the icing its not bad. Overall Taste Rating: 2.5 Sprinkles

Texture: The icing is a little crunchy and hardened on the outside, but smooth on the inside, although the crunchiness of the outside layer doesn't dissipate in my mouth and is a little odd. The carrot cake texture is okay, a little dry, nothing great but not horribly offensive. However, "not horribly offensive" is not exactly a glowing accolade. Overall Texture Rating: 2.5 Sprinkles

Aesthetic: This is a pretty big cupcake, even in height and width, with the icing a bit sloppily applied, and a cute but uneven smattering of something on the top, I think cake crumbs. Not super pretty, unfortunately. Overall Aesthetic Rating: 2 out of 5 sprinkles

Satisfaction: This was pretty unsatisfying-- a whopping $5 expense, for something I threw away most of in disgust as opposed to in self-restraint, and nothing in this cupcake was really up to par. The icing was the highlight, but still not stellar on the cream cheese frosting rating scale. Overall Satisfaction Rating: 2.5 out of 5 sprinkles

Overall Cupcake Ranking: 9.5 Sprinkles (out of 20 possible)

Sage (sold by Dean & DeLuca) Hostess Style Chocolate Cupcake

Sage Hostess-Style Cupcake from Dean & DeLuca, $5.00,
http://www.sagegeneralstore.com/ and http://www.deandeluca.com

I have an amazing recipe that I use to make delicious Hostess-style filled cupcakes at home, so I don't usually buy them elsewhere because few cupcakes can live up to my home-baked ones, but as the Cupcake Connoisseur it is my duty to sample what else is out there! So, I tried this Hostess-style cupcake from Sage.

Taste: The chocolate icing is bitter, and not sweet at all, although probably made with real bittersweet chocolate and not cocoa powder, judging by the taste. The cake is also slightly bitter and has not the slightest hint of sweetness and barely any chocolatey taste. The vanilla cream inside the cupcake is bland and not tasty-- it's the same white cream as in the zig-zag on top of the cupcake, and its somewhat tasteless and gritty. A Hostess style cupcake isn't meant to be super sweet, and my personal chocolate icing recipe does use real bittersweet chocolate, but my vanilla cream filling is really sweet and so together they strike a nice balance. In contrast, the Sage cupcake has bittersweet icing, bitter cake, and tasteless cream filling, and so together there's no sweetness to the cupcake. Blech! Overall Taste Rating: 0 out of 5 sprinkles

Texture: The cake texture is dry, not at all moist like the Sage Vanilla Cupcake, but instead very dry and maybe even a bit stale. The chocolate icing has a good texture despite the bad taste, very smooth and silky on my tongue. There is barely ANY vanilla cream filling in the middle of the cupcake, and the filling (which is also the zigzag on top) is VERY gritty. Blech! Overall Texture Rating: 2 out of 5 sprinkles

Aesthetic: Aesthetics is the only place this cupcake is going to win any major points with me. It's bigger than the traditional commercial Hostess cupcakes, with dark chocolatey colored cake and rich, glossy dark chocolate colored frosting, and a cute white zig-zag across the top, albeit sloppily applied, but the cupcake has that appealing homemade look as opposed to the from-the-box mass-produced look. The exterior appearance of this cupcake is what compelled me to buy it in the first place! Overall Aesthetic Rating: 4 out of 5 sprinkles!

Satisfaction: In addition to the fact that this cupcake didn't taste very good and had a bad texture, there was barely ANY chocolate icing on the top, although I can accept the fact that a Hostess cupcake by design only has a thin layer of icing across the top. BUT, what is unforgiveable is that there was hardly ANY cream filling inside the cupcake! And topped off by the racket price of $5.00 for this abomination of a cupcake, my satisfaction was practically negative! Overall Satisfaction Rating: 0 out of 5 sprinkles

Overall Cupcake Ranking: 6 Sprinkles (out of 20 possible)

Sage (sold by Dean & DeLuca) Vanilla Frosting on Vanilla Cake

Sage Cupcake from Dean & DeLuca in Rockefeller Center, Vanilla Frosting on Vanilla Cake

http://www.sagegeneralstore.com/ and http://www.deandeluca.com, a whopping $5 from Dean & DeLuca

Taste: The vanilla frosting is tangy and almost tastes lemony, but it's different and I like it. The cake has a nice, buttery flavor to it. Together, they blend nicely-- I'm trying to pinpoint the exact tastes at play, but my mouth is mostly just saying "YUM!" Overall Taste Rating: 4 out of 5 sprinkles!

Texture: The frosting is very light, perhaps whipped, and very smooth. The cake receives exceptional credit for being super moist and soft. Overall Texture Rating: 5 out of 5 sprinkles!!!!

Aesthetic: This is a fairly big cupcake-- smaller than a Crumbs, but bigger than a Magnolia or a Buttercup. And I know it looks a little messed up in the photo, but I have to confess that the smeared off icing was 100% entirely my fault because it got mussed in transit, but when I purchased it the icing was applied very smoothly and the aesthetic was good, although the icing was applied thinly and not heaped as high as Crumbs, Magnolia and Buttercup heap their icing. Something about the sheen of the icing on this cupcake appealed to me-- the icing of many cupcakes I've sampled isn't so nice and glossy. The cake was also more yellow and true to a deep yellow cake than the pale golden cakes I've sampled before. I was very pleased with its appearance, and very upset that I tipped it over in its container after I left the store and smeared the icing. Overall Aesthetic Rating: 5 out of 5 sprinkles!!

Satisfaction: There was one big problem with this cupcake-- the cost! When I saw this cupcake was $5, I wouldn't have purchased it if not for my devotion to cupcake sampling for CupcakeRankings.com. But for $5, this cupcake had better be extra special. And though it was very good, I'm just not sure it was worth $5. It might have been good enough to be worth $3.50, but for $5, I wouldn't buy one again. I assume Dean & DeLuca is responsible for the markup and not Sage, but come on, it wasn't filled with gold. Overall Satisfaction Rating: 3 out of 5 sprinkles.

Overall Cupcake Ranking: 17 Sprinkles! (Out of 20 possible)